Vodka we dont need no stinking Vodka

Bio Freeze Day 1 My calf muscle made a popping sound as I was running ladders while working out and then started hurting like hell. So ice it and prop it up right? Well two treatments later and still no relief but I fully intended to attend The Pacer game so 6 IB profrin and a gob of Bio Freeze and the leg goes numb nice! Until I rub my eye with the fingers that rubbed the Bio Freeze in Holly Shit that stings. This would have been the dumbest thing ever until I decided I needed a cookie and with using the same fingers. So now I can’t walk, see or talk my I am a genius. Along the lines of brains I take 6 more IB profrin bringing the total to 12 and so my stomach hurts.

Bio Freeze Day 2 work out take a shower and slab on another mound of Bio Freeze this time I am in shorts and my leg feels better when I tuck it under me. So now the bottom side of my thigh is frozen so quickly move my leg and drag the heel of my foot through it then return to the original position and place my heel under my rear where my uhm well uhm –any one want to play with say balls? - happens to be holly shit this isn’t good at least not right now any way. Now we forget that I have lunch in the oven so go limping into the kitchen and reach in with out thinking and pull out the cookie sheet with no hot pad. AHHHH.

How did this happen

I have spent 47 of my nearly 50 years not watching TV I like to read, I enjoy movies and love sports but have always felt TV was dumb and a waste of time; Oh by the way Jeopardy does not count in this discussion. When people talk about old shows I know what they are talking about but never was able to chime in because I did not watch them, I can talk about the new shows though.

Since my marriage I have always picked one or two shows a year that I would watch with Nanc not that I would have normally but mainly because it was just something to enjoy together. But then a few years ago along came all of these mini dramas and I like them in roughly this order:
1. C Word
2. Sons of Anarchy
3. Californication
4. Mad Men
5. Justified
6. Walking Dead
7. Hell on Wheels
8. Board Walk Empire
9. True Blood
10. Weeds
11. Dexter * I have given up on this one*

Now Kait tells me I need to tune into The Firm ah nuts you know I will. My personal photo will soon look like this at least this is how I feel I am becoming.

Pull-em Up

Dear Snoop Droopy Drawers while my first reaction is you are a doofus and will not understand a moment of clarity I still feel obligated to try and help you to the understanding and origin of your pants hanging a foot to low.

Where did the sagging pants fashion statement come from? Why the answer is easy Ricky Swavay, jail. You need to know that when arrested the state feels obligated to protect your dumb ass from yourself as you have proven you are not too bright. So upon arrival they take away your belongings including your belt as not to let you hang yourself. I could argue what is the issue with you no longer being here but I will try and remain polite. Since the prison system is not as concerned if your new clothes fit as they are with you committing Harry Carey the pants tend to be one or two sizes fit's all and they will fall and sag. This is where that comes from jail dip shit and since I do not care to be in prison nor do not care to see a teen age boy walking down the street with his drawers around his thighs and his boxers sticking out from the top of these trousers pull them the F--k up. All though I will say that on more than one occasion I have felt the urge to walk up to the perpetrator of this fashion statement and deliver one of the worlds greatest wedgies.